Professional fear-monger Alex Jones recently went viral with a rant that has been universally derided as balls-out crazy, wherein he discusses his theory that the Power Elite/Illuminati/New World Order overlords are coming into communication with extra-dimensional beings through the inhalation of that most Reality-Shattering of molecules: DMT.

This journey is over. It all started seven years ago with Out There Radio, Raymond and Joe and I all crowded around the precarious microphones dangling over the soundboard in the studio at WUOG.

Unfortunately for the aspiring necromancer, the Beijing Olympics caused China to ban the export of human bones. This caused the price of human bone matter to skyrocket to record levels. Expect to pay no less than about $800 for a human skull these days, which ounce per ounce puts a human skull at approximately the trading price of silver. Nobody said raising a skeleton army would be cheap.

Saudi Arabia’s Anti-Witchcraft Unit has been mobilized again, this time in response to the discovery of the severed head of a wolf wrapped, apparently, in women’s lingerie.

We came to see the Hellfire Caves, the satanic sanctuary three hundred feet below where we stood. Ken, Kev, Katie, and I wanted to walk the gloomy passages where the aristocracy of a bygone age had reveled in blasphemous orgies and infernal rites. It was time to descend into those mysterious depths. Just after we hit the gift shop.

Hoodoo’s place in history suffers even worse than many other magickal practices: its value (or even existence!) is widely ignored by occultists and mainstream historians alike. As a young magician coming to my power in the States, I consider this a terrible shame.